The beginning of the school year is quite stressful for many students. Some are returning to familiar places and people, while others will start a completely new chapter in their lives. We are talking about first-graders who have just started primary school. How can you support your child to ensure a good start?
LISTEN, DON'T JUDGE!
Statistics indicate that as many as one in five Polish teenagers may experience mental and emotional problems. Twice as many young people report symptoms of depression as 10 years ago. Experts emphasize that school is a source of significant stress for students, and problems can begin even in very young children. It's important not to downplay the feelings of children from the outset. Psychologists say this is fundamental to safety. Fear of school, especially first grade, is natural and appropriate, especially among children who have never attended nursery or kindergarten – a psychologist explains Marika Auksztulewicz. - At first, such children react with crying, extreme anxiety, or trouble sleeping. However, when we begin to change our approach a bit, talk to our children, and at the same time consider that they may actually be afraid of something and that it's not just imagination, then things usually work out. The main principle is simple – talk to and validate the child's emotions – the specialist emphasizes.
A POSITIVE ATTITUDE IS ESSENTIAL!
While the above statement may seem trivial, there's a lot of truth to it. How we adults approach children's new challenges, what we say about school, and how we experience the emotions associated with the changes in our little daughter's or son's life directly impacts young students and can give them a positive boost or deepen their fears. I think telling a child about yourself as a child can be a good support. It helps them realize that when we were their age, we were scared too, and that it's normal for everyone to experience similar stress. This usually significantly reduces the stress associated with school for a young person," she notes. Auksztulewicz.
It is good to assure the child that they can ask whatever they want. Do not scare or allow older siblings or cousins to do it. It is also worth encouraging the first grader to gain knowledge, realizing that thanks to it they will become independent. Also, assure the child that even if some difficulties appear, there is always a supportive adult who will help overcome them.
TO SCHOOL WITHOUT EXCESSIVE PRESSURE
Good support for a first grader is not just about emotional care. It is important for the child to be aware that something important is starting, but not to be subjected to unnecessary pressure.
– It's important. We should make sure that first-graders, colloquially speaking, aren't pressured, that they have to, that they should, that there are some requirements, that it's a new life, a new world, because that increases anxiety – psychologist Marika Auksztulewicz emphasizes. This process should be natural and “relaxed.” Allowing a young person to be themselves is the basis for their sense of security in a new situation.
– It's also about the child not having to be smiling all the time, it's nice for everyone that he can be a little on the side sometimes – explains the expert. She also notes that taking care of the child's comfort should go hand in hand with preparing them for their new role, responsibilities and challenges.
SCHOOL – BETWEEN LEARNING AND FUN
School is initially about learning to write, read and count. In order for a child to cope with their lessons, it is necessary to strengthen their sense of responsibility and arouse curiosity. However, it is also worth remembering that seven-year-olds are not able to concentrate on one task for a long time. It is therefore good to combine homework with play or organize breaks from time to time, e.g. for a short walk or a game of football.
- School is a place where a child should learn, not be the best at everything. – Marika Auksztulewicz recalls. – Parents' expectations should therefore be in line with their child's abilities. It might also be worth considering whether, in addition to schoolwork, extracurricular activities like horseback riding, chess, swimming, and foreign languages are beneficial for a young person, and whether we would like to live this way ourselves. concludes the expert.
Too much pressure, too many responsibilities, no time to talk, emotional indifference and problems in relationships with peers are the most common causes of mental disorders in school-age children. They can be prevented by being attentive to the child and reacting in time. How to do it and what to pay attention to? What early symptoms should worry you, where and when to seek specialist support? We will answer these and other questions in the next episodes of the new series, podcasts WHAT DOES YOUR DOCTOR SAY?, about the psychological problems of children and youth. Premiere episodes on successive Wednesdays in September. We invite you to listen!